NBA Finals: Analysis from Dion Waiters

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Wait hold up seriously hold the Samsung Galaxy Edge for just one sec I don’t care who you’re talking to hold it – make them wait – tell them you don’t know how long it’ll be could be a day or 5 seconds depending on how long it takes for you to pick your jaw up off the ground….. Ok so for real hold up.

You’re telling me that so-called “All-Star point guard” got hurt and then the Cavs beat the Warriors at Oracle?

Surprise,_Surprise_2012

Nobody predicted that.

What I’m sayin’ is I’ve been sayin’. He’s no starting point guard. I’m not a math… err…

A math man? Is it a math man? Is that what that is? A math man? Or like a mathian?

Oh shit. Mathematician. That’s right. Back to it – I’m no mathematician but like this formula seems to be checking out.

1 team that’s (0-1) in the Finals  1 dude named Kyrie = 1 team that’s now (1-1) in the Finals 

It has nothing to do with bitterness or the fact that I could have taken this team to the top with my eyes closed. I’m stating facts. The Cavs are winning with Matthew Dellavedova. Imagine what they could’ve done with me…

Whoa, right?

I like Delly but come on, man. Where’s the arm waving? How will anyone know you’re ready to take it to the next level?

Now, I’d never judge a man. In fact, I don’t think I’ve ever judged anyone in my life. Mom told me “Ye who throws the first stone at… prostitutes, is without sin? Or shant be the stone thrower first. Thou must wait until… something something whatever.” Words aren’t important – the moral is that judgement is wrong. That’s why I don’t judge Delly and why I’ve never judged Kyrie for being the worst human. I could but I don’t.

Basically I’m asking you to lean forward and picture me on the Cavs right now. Your first thought is probably the same as mine… “Damn. I’m glad he found himself a better situation / winning environment.” Second thought has to be whether it would’ve taken Cleveland 4 games or 5 games to beat the Dubs had they not shipped away the best talent they’ve ever seen.

And that’s no disrespect to LeBron. Dude can ball. Like, a great man can look at another great man and recognize game. That’s the definition of respect. Watch…

Yo, LeBron.

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But LeBron can only do so much. That’s what happens when you can’t focus like I can. Look, I already wrote about judgement so I won’t go there but I never understand why players don’t study the game like I do. When I was in Cleveland, after every game I’m watching Sports Center. The other guys? In the gym and the weight room just “hanging out.” I don’t got time for that – I gotta be studying game film. That’s why I never miss a SC Top 10 list. To be great you gotta study great. All I’m sayin’ is that’s the difference between me and LeBron.

Anyways, I wasn’t shocked Cleveland won. Wouldn’t surprise me if they won it all and immediately expressed their remorse about sending me away. Truth.

-DION

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