Comparing Andray Blatche to LeBron James: 5-vs-5

Bron Blatche

Bron Blatche

Reggie Evans had some words for LeBron James regarding his championship, and really his over-all level of talent.

“LeBron is no different from Joe Johnson or Andray Blatche.  No different,” Evans told the Daily News.”

A comparison between LeBron James to Andray Blatche is a tough pill to swallow.  So we turn to some experts to help us digest this information.

1. In what way is LeBron James the same as Andray Blatche?

Beckley Mason – ESPN.COM – Both guys didn’t go to college, instead choosing to take a gap year in Paris before trying their hands at professional basketball on a lark.

Chris Trew – – They are both on posters in my bedroom. I have both of their rookie cards. They are both fans of Deep Blue Sea (the film and the soundtrack).

Jason Gallagher – – Hmm… this is hard.  Oh!  LeBron is wearing a hat in his twitter avatar… and so is Mr. Blatche.   You almost stumped me there.  Do I get a cash prize or something?

Chandler Goodman – – They both think Kevin Garnett should chill out.

Tyler Parker – – LeBron is the same as Blatche the same way dreams are the same as nightmares.


2. In what way is LeBron James different than Andray Blatche?

Mason – LeBron James hates Romantic-era plays.

Trew – Nobody has ever burned a jersey of Andray Blatche on the news.  But please, never say never

Gallagher – In what way is James different than Blatche?  I’d say in a good way.

Goodman – 15,614 points. 4,396 assists. 2,815 rebounds. 882 steals. 9 All-Star games. 3 MVPs. 129.2 wins.  (all according to )

Parker – LeBron plays basketball like a being would if they were the offspring of a rhinoceros and Jason Bourne. Blatche plays like a being would if they were the offspring of a dirty diaper and season 2 of Friday Night Lights.


3. You are the GM of a team.  Would you rather build your team around  LeBron James or Andray Blatche?

Mason – I wouldn’t want to build anything around James that wouldn’t allow him to escape because he’s pretty useful on the basketball court.

Trew – I would rather build my team around Lebron the player. I would rather build my practice facility around Andray Blatche. Like, physically build a practice facility around him.

Gallagher – Depends on what kind of “team” we are talking about.  If it’s a basketball team; probably LeBron.  But if I’m building a solid sales team, I go with Blatche, no doubt.  The guy is the best sales closer in the game.

Goodman – Neither. Personally, I want two and a half years of Rudy Gay for $45.4 million. (I’m looking at you Bryan Colangelo.)

Parker – I’d rather build my team around LeBron even if he had one arm and developed narcolepsy and was dead.


4. Does Reggie Evans’ statement put Andray Blatche in the MVP conversation?

Mason – We’re talking about it, aren’t we? But seriously, Blatche is clearly in the running for Most Voluptuous Profile.

Trew – He is always in the MVP conversation. Is this question a joke? Are all these questions jokes?

Gallagher – Well yeah it does, as well as you and me and everyone who has ever played basketball and everyone who has never played basketball.  We are all in it!  I’ll probably vote for myself.  No shame.

Goodman – No.  Reggie Evans: Good at rebounding, bad at comparing NBA players.

Parker – Andray Blatche is in the MVP conversation if the two people holding the conversation are drunk Andray Blatche and hammered Reggie Evans.


5. In what way is Rob Schneider the same as Daniel Day Lewis?

Mason – Both guys secretly want to kill Adam Sandler.

Trew – I don’t appreciate all these joke questions wasting my time. Rob Schneider is a God.

Gallagher – They were both in movies based on Abraham Lincoln.  DDL in “Lincoln” and Schneider in the less obvious “The Animal.”

Goodman – They both think Kevin Garnett should chill out.

Parker – They both have skin.


Follow these boys on Twitter: @beckleymason, @christrew, @jgallagher41, @suchagoodman, and @tpisme .


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