What’s Gotten Into Gordon Hayward?

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[Interior: Utah Jazz Locker Room]

Coach Corbin: Great team win, guys.  Seriously, awesome job.  Game ball definitely goes to Derrick Favors.

D. Favors: Yeeeeaaahh

Coach Corbin: Alright, Listen up.  We have a big —

Gordan Bulb 2

[Lights shut off]

Voice: Do you like camping?

B. Rush: Yo!  Who is that?!!

[Single bulb clicks on]

Gordan Bulb

 

G. Hayward: I love camping

[Gordon is staring at himself in a mirror]

T. Burke: Gordon?

G. Hayward: I went last weekend with my childhood friend, Luke.  It was meant to be a harmless affair.

D. Favors: Yo.

G. Hayward: The daytime was a mundane mixture of barbecuing with beautiful women and swimming in a lake saturated with alcohol and urine.

B. Rush: Hey man.

G. Hayward: Mindless I was.  I was….  As night fell, I began to feel.  A peculiar thing happened.  I walked alone to retrieve the brush that would ignite our fire.

[Gordon turns his head]

G. Hayward: I like fire very much now, Trey.

T. Burke: Ok…

[Gordon turns back around]

G. Hayward: As I bent over to pick up the brush, I saw a figure in the distance.  It was 11 feet tall with green eyes.  I was lost in its beauty as it slowly glided towards me.  It told me to do things…

D. Favors: …word?

G. Hayward: Ever since that trip, I feel different – more alive.   I miss Luke.

[Silence]

G. Hayward: I need to go now.

[Gordan drops the bulb and it shatters.  Every player panics and exits the locker room as quickly as possible.]

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