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An Infographic Preview to Game 6 of the NBA Finals

by Chandler Goodman on Jun 18, 2013 • No Comments

A comprehensive guide to Game 6 of the NBA Finals

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“How am I still open!?” – Danny Green & Blockbuster Video

by Jason Gallagher on Jun 17, 2013 • No Comments

Green and Blockbuster. One Question. Two different reasons for asking it.

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Dad & Dennis Johnson

by Tyler Parker on Jun 17, 2013 • No Comments

I love basketball because my dad loves basketball. I was saturated with it from the jump. Once, when I was 11 or 12, we were at my Mema and Pepa’s [ ... ]

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Patrick Ewing’s Office: The Memories Jordan Won’t Let Die

by Tyler Parker on Jun 14, 2013 • No Comments

Patrick Ewing is tired. His knees ache. His adrenaline has been stripped from him and he’s left to wait on the second floor hallway bathroom stall to become available while [ ... ]

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“Never Do the Right Thing” – A Children’s Book by Brian Shaw

by Jason Gallagher on Jun 13, 2013 • No Comments

Brian Shaw is mad. So Brian Shaw wrote a children's book.

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Gary Neal, Danny Green, and T-Mac – The New BIG 3

by Jason Gallagher on Jun 12, 2013 • No Comments

Tracy McGrady pays a visit to his newly formed BIG 3.

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“Oh yeah, its over!”

by John Sabine on Jun 12, 2013 • No Comments

That guy at your work has some things to say about this series.

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The Spurs & The Tide Are The Same

by Tyler Parker on Jun 12, 2013 • No Comments

I watched the Spurs play in person once. It was in Oklahoma City. They were playing the Thunder. The company my friend Colt works for gave him tickets and he [ ... ]

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Matt Bonner’s Response Letter To LeBron’s Block

by Tyler Parker on Jun 11, 2013 • No Comments

This is for real. True serious truth. Like Raekwon’s lyrics or the message in Hook being about how red mohawks are super cool. And, like a lot of truth out [ ... ]

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VIDEO: A Tribute to LeBron’s Block on Tiago Splitter

by Jason Gallagher on Jun 10, 2013 • No Comments

The King blocks. We rejoice and pay our respects.

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LEAKED NSA SURVEILLANCE of GREGG POPOVICH

by Mark Colomb on Jun 10, 2013 • No Comments

Ballerball has a source within the NSA that has leaked us what we believe to be a conversation between San Antonio Spurs Head Coach Gregg Popovich and what we can [ ... ]

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The Epic Tale of Tony Parker’s Shot

by Jason Gallagher on Jun 7, 2013 • No Comments

The incredible story of Tony Parker's 24 second journey to victory.

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Behind the scenes: Denver Nuggets

by Joseph Nicks on Jun 7, 2013 • No Comments

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NBA FINAL TALE OF THE TAPE

by Mark Colomb on Jun 6, 2013 • No Comments

Are you tired of reading senseless NBA Finals preview coverage? No… really? Wow. It’s only been a couple of days and I am already exhausted. Here is one more. [ ... ]

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2013 NBA Finals Infographic

by Chandler Goodman on Jun 6, 2013 • No Comments

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VIDEO: NBA Media Member Madness!

by Jason Gallagher on Jun 6, 2013 • No Comments

Ever wonder what it’s like to be a real-life Media Member in the 2013 NBA Playoffs? You don’t have to wonder anymore! Presenting: Media Member Madness!

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Detlef Schrempf Went To A Kenny Chesney Concert

by Tyler Parker on Jun 5, 2013 • No Comments

Detlef Schrempf went to a Kenny Chesney concert. You can read his blow by blow opinions in 140 characters or less here. When pressed for a more thorough review, this [ ... ]

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San Antonio vs Miami: THIS GUY WON’T STOP LOOKING AT ME (Volume 2)

by Jason Gallagher on Jun 4, 2013 • 1 Comment

Finally, the moment has arrived. It’s booked and baked and ready to be taken out of the oven. Our NBA Finals match-up is set between the San Antonio Spurs and [ ... ]

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The NBA Breathes a Sigh of Relief

by Ryan Weisert on Jun 4, 2013 • No Comments

BallerBall readers, can we be real for a second? I know Commissioner David Stern is supposed to be impartial when it comes to which teams win and lose in the [ ... ]

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NBA Finals Preview… from yesterday

by John Sabine on Jun 4, 2013 • No Comments

I wanted to write a Finals preview but just realized I have a Groupon for Rock and Roll Aqua Laser Tag that expires today, so I will miss Game 7. [ ... ]

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Norris Cole’s Memorial Day Supreme Magestipartay: Part IV

by Tyler Parker on Jun 3, 2013 • No Comments

This is the fourth and final part. Part 1 is here. Part 2 is here. Part 3 is here. There’s no way you’re reading all those, I know. [ ... ]

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NBA Doppelgangers: Shrek, Star Wars

by Joseph Nicks on Jun 3, 2013 • No Comments

This is really pointless. But I was trolling the internet – or it was trolling me, I’m still not sure – and this just sort of happened. *** SHREK Glen [ ... ]

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The Heat’s Big Three Speak

by Mark Colomb on Jun 3, 2013 • 1 Comment

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Norris Cole’s Memorial Day Supreme Magestipartay: Part III

by Tyler Parker on May 30, 2013 • No Comments

She moves with a slow curiosity, not wanting to miss anything. She moves from the dance hall into the next room. In it, spinning and mesmerizing and hypnotizing, is a [ ... ]

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Steve Clifford’s Cover Letter To The Charlotte Bobcats

by Chandler Goodman on May 30, 2013 • No Comments

The Charlotte Bobcats announced Lakers assistant Steve Clifford as their new head coach yesterday, their 6th in 7 years. Ballerball obtained the cover letter Clifford sent in his pursuit of the [ ... ]

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Norris Cole’s Memorial Day Supreme Magestipartay: Part II

by Tyler Parker on May 29, 2013 • No Comments

Part I is here if you somehow weren’t one of the 19 people who read it but you probably were so let’s move on. PART II First, the smell. It slaps [ ... ]

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Playoff Juice: May 19-May 25

by John Sabine on May 24, 2013 • No Comments

Your quick catch-up on all things NBA.

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Comment Section Analysis: Is LeBron “Clutch?”

by Jason Gallagher on May 23, 2013 • 1 Comment

Someone has something to say about LeBron's "clutch" finish last night.

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The Ramblings of a Lunatic with a #1 Pick

by Chandler Goodman on May 22, 2013 • No Comments

As I type this, it has been 80 minutes since the Cleveland Cavs won the #1 pick in the 2013 NBA Draft.

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The Turquoise Nest

by Tyler Parker on May 22, 2013 • No Comments

Where is VH1 because the 90′s are back and I love them. Grab your pogs and your JNCOs you who live along that creek that runs by Dawson’s house because, while [ ... ]

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The 2012-2013 New York Knicks Edition of CLUE

by Jason Gallagher on May 21, 2013 • No Comments

Now you and your friends can join in on the fun! Find the culprit, blame them with harsh criticisms and bring them to justice for wrecking the Knicks 2012-2013 season

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Sam Jones Karaoke

by Tyler Parker on May 21, 2013 • No Comments

*This isn’t real. I’m in Chicago in a bar called McGuinty’s or some other Irish something. There’s karaoke here. The televisions are blasting some combination of Kings-Sharks and Knicks-Pacers and [ ... ]

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The Gopher & The Bobcat: A Conversation Between Gregg Popovich & Kawhi Leonard

by Tyler Parker on May 20, 2013 • No Comments

“Miguel? I don’t care about him. Stop singing to me, Kawhi. I haven’t heard Adorn or whatever it is and I don’t plan on hearing it.” Gregg Popovich is tired. [ ... ]

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BREAKING: Russell Westbrook Matters

by Jason Gallagher on May 16, 2013 • 1 Comment

Formulas to help doubters understand the importance of Westbrook.

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Klay Thompson is DVR-ing the Office Finale

by John Sabine on May 16, 2013 • No Comments

Klay Thompson is excited. His team is tied with the Spurs, he’s playing well, and he just set up his DVR so he can record the series finale of “The [ ... ]

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Sympathy for Jason Kidd

by Chandler Goodman on May 16, 2013 • No Comments

You don’t know me, and we live very different lives. You are an 18-year NBA veteran, a 10-time All-Star, a two-time Gold Medalist, and one of the half dozen greatest point guards to ever pick up a basketball.

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Kenyon Martin & Step by Vampire Weekend

by Tyler Parker on May 15, 2013 • No Comments

We asked Kenyon Martin to listen to "Step" by Vampire Weekend and write down his thoughts. His words are below.

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Sports America Vote: Who was the Screaming Lady at Last Night’s Spurs/Warriors Game?

by Jason Gallagher on May 7, 2013 • No Comments

You heard it. I heard it. We all suffered from it. The woman who was screaming during the Spurs vs. Warriors game last night. I don't know about you guys, but I'm still recovering.

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Hawks vs. Pacers: An Infographic Guide to the Series

by Chandler Goodman on May 3, 2013 • No Comments

We know you haven't watched it, so here's your guide to everything you need to know about the Hawks vs. Pacers.

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Nate Robinson Is Charlie Conway

by Tyler Parker on May 3, 2013 • No Comments

A blended and liquid Kris Humphries is the best kind of Kris Humphries because that is the kind that goes down the most easily. Mix him up and put the [ ... ]

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The Secret History of Strange NBA Team Names From The Past That People Don’t Seem To Remember

by Mark Colomb on May 2, 2013 • No Comments

Welcome to the first installment of Ballerball’s “The Secret History of Strange NBA Team Names From The Past That People Don’t Seem To Remember.” It looks like the The [ ... ]

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Selling Pacers Tickets

by John Sabine on May 2, 2013 • No Comments

The Indiana Pacers are the 3rd best team in the Eastern Conference, have one of the best defenses in the league, and an emerging superstar in Paul George. Despite all of these positives, the Indiana Pacers can’t sell out a playoff home game.

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Mr. D’Antoni’s (Tragic) Opus

by Ryan Weisert on May 1, 2013 • No Comments

Throughout his career as an NBA head coach, Mike D’Antoni has tried to write the perfect tragedy.

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JaVale McGee & Celebrating: The Lit Future

by Tyler Parker on May 1, 2013 • 1 Comment

JaVale McGee is a painter and a sculptor and a craftsman and a prophet and his celebrations work in us and through us and reveal to us the secrets of [ ... ]

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SEGA Presents: Z-Bo vs. Griffin – The Chippy Showdown

by Jason Gallagher on Apr 30, 2013 • No Comments

SEGA releases another video game, "Z-Bo vs. Griffin"

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I Kind of Ate Dinner With JJ Redick & Jim Boylan

by Tyler Parker on Apr 30, 2013 • 1 Comment

There’s really no moral to this story at all. I just thought it was an interesting thing that happened. It’ll end and you might be all, “What was the point [ ... ]

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Joakim & Andray’s Feet: A Conversation

by Tyler Parker on Apr 23, 2013 • No Comments

Joakim Noah’s bad feet and Andray Blatche’s good feet saw each other in passing in the tunnel after the Bulls win over the Nets on Monday night. This is the [ ... ]

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A Letter From Joe Lacob Regarding the Playoffs

by Mark Colomb on Apr 17, 2013 • 1 Comment

Who knew that preparing for the playoffs would be so much work?

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Thundering: Fading Honeymoon

by Tyler Parker on Apr 12, 2013 • 5 Comments

I am incapable of faking it when I don’t like how food tastes. I’ve found this out from friends in recent years. It pissed off a girl once who put [ ... ]

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Pau Gasol: The Smiling Protector

by Jason Gallagher on Apr 9, 2013 • No Comments

Pau Gasol has a history of hamming it up while he's supposed to be watching over things.

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Reggie Jackson: The Nicest Guy in Gaillardia

by Tyler Parker on Apr 8, 2013 • No Comments

You know how you read a feature sometimes and everything is just consistently too good to be true? This is a fake feature. I didn’t go to Qdoba with Reggie [ ... ]

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My Kevin Durant Story

by Jason Gallagher on Apr 5, 2013 • 2 Comments

Let me start by saying: I’m not a Thunder fan. This is important to know. For some strange reason, I was lucky enough to have media access for last week’s [ ... ]

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An NBA Confession

by Tim Baltz on Apr 4, 2013 • No Comments

My uncle once told me there’s no better way to introduce yourself to someone than by telling them a secret that will probably make them dislike you. He is a [ ... ]

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Milwaukee Bucks 2013 Conspiracy Video

by Jason Gallagher on Apr 4, 2013 • No Comments

There’s been this Lakers conspiracy video that’s been floating around and we just want to go on the record and say that it’s complete crap. Because WE ALL KNOW that [ ... ]

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The Glove

by Tyler Parker on Apr 3, 2013 • No Comments

Rap Game Corvallis, Oregon. I was in the fifth grade playing Y-League ball with the Muskogee Bulls when they showed up. Seemed like they were from another planet. They had [ ... ]

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Hawks & Wolves & Cords, Oh No

by Tyler Parker on Apr 2, 2013 • No Comments

I once chose Mountain Dew Baja Blast over regular Mountain Dew at a Taco Bell and felt good about it. So, in no way am I perfect either. Coach Taylor [ ... ]

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NBA Players and Ebay

by John Sabine on Apr 2, 2013 • No Comments

It has been well documented that some NBA players have recently had financial difficulty. Some NBA players have turned to Ebay and Craiglist to sell some of their goods [ ... ]

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I Noticed Something Incredible About LeBron and Durant’s Game That Nobody Has Touched On Yet

by Jason Gallagher on Apr 1, 2013 • 2 Comments

I know we do a lot of jokes and stuff on here, but when I was doing some research for a funny piece I was working on, I actually noticed [ ... ]

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NBA Con Air

by Ryan Weisert on Apr 1, 2013 • No Comments

To: Mrs. Anucha Browne Sanders RE: Our next movie project _____ I’m so happy to hear that you and the League are excited to start production on [ ... ]

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An Original Video Tribute to the Miami Heat’s 27 Game Win Streak

by Jason Gallagher on Mar 28, 2013 • 1 Comment

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The Knicks Passover Seder: Hosted by Amar’e

by Chandler Goodman on Mar 26, 2013 • No Comments

Since visiting Israel in 2010, Knicks power forward Amar’e Stoudemire has frequently publicly expressed his interest in Judaism, and revealed his gradual adoption of its rituals and practices. This year, [ ... ]

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J.R. Smith – Unsportsmanlike or Man of the People?

by Jason Gallagher on Mar 25, 2013 • No Comments

This weekend, in the midst of all the Madness that March had to offer, we had ourselves a little blowout given to the Toronto Raptors via the New York Knicks. [ ... ]

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The Ballerball Photo Vault

by Jason Gallagher on Mar 22, 2013 • 1 Comment

We went digging in the deepest depths of our photo vault to find some pictures that haven’t been seen by many folks. Let’s take a look. ________________________________________________________ April [ ... ]

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The Four Clipper Women of West Hollywood

by Tyler Parker on Mar 20, 2013 • No Comments

Thank you for taking a break from listening to the 20/20 Experience to read this sentence and maybe the ones after it. I’m at the Staples Center for the first [ ... ]

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St. Patrick’s Day Edition of 5-vs-5 – Kiss Me I’m…

by Staff on Mar 15, 2013 • No Comments

St. Patrick’s Day is just around the corner which means your city streets will be filled with alcoholics wearing these incredibly original “Kiss Me I’m Irish” t-shirts. In today’s 5-vs-5, [ ... ]

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Q & A: Kris Humphries

by Tyler Parker on Mar 15, 2013 • No Comments

Ballerball caught up with Kris Humphries, forward for the Brooklyn Nets. We asked him some questions and he answered them. We should mention, however, that these are all super fake. [ ... ]

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NBA Conclave

by Ryan Weisert on Mar 14, 2013 • No Comments

On Wednesday, social media was bombarded with reactions to the election of a new pope. One simple puff of white smoke inspired over 7 million tweets, and that number continues [ ... ]

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The Bucks & The Bathroom

by Tyler Parker on Mar 13, 2013 • No Comments

I have a day job because I don’t get paid for this. I don’t mean that in any hateful way, this gig is incredible and I’m nowhere near the [ ... ]

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Exclusive Doctor’s Report: Knight Suffering From Chronic Humiliation Syndrome

by Chandler Goodman on Mar 11, 2013 • 2 Comments

– Exhibiting physical and emotional symptoms following DeAndre Jordan’s dunking assault, last night, Detroit Pistons officials rushed point guard Brandon Knight to seek attention from the same Doctor he visited after Kyrie [ ... ]

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The Not-So-Famous Side of Sloan

by Ryan Weisert on Mar 8, 2013 • No Comments

In the world of sports and business there is no larger and more important summit than the MIT Sloan Sports Analytics Conference. From humble beginnings, Sloan, as it’s affectionately [ ... ]

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Muted Reggie Miller, Gate B21, & Ugly Jordans

by Tyler Parker on Mar 8, 2013 • No Comments

My plane was supposed to leave at 8:40 PM CST. The Southwest lady on the PA system tells me to scratch that idea. We’re leaving at 10:10 now. I cry [ ... ]

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David Stern’s Bucket List

by John Sabine on Mar 7, 2013 • No Comments

David Stern is retiring soon and Ballerball has obtained exclusive rights to his post retirement Bucket List. David Stern’s Bucket List 1. Go on Shark Tank. 2. Get Metta [ ... ]

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Dispatches from the Land of (Possibly/Probably Irrelevant) Statistical Intrigue

by Chandler Goodman on Mar 6, 2013 • No Comments

I don’t get to watch games as much as I used to. Don’t get me wrong, I still watch a lot. A ton, if you ask my girlfirend. She finds [ ... ]

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Chris Paul: Joyful Groin Puncher

by Tyler Parker on Mar 6, 2013 • No Comments

Hands strike and give flowers and groins may no longer take comfort on an NBA floor. —– Upon hearing the news that Oklahoma City Thunder power forward and ESPN Magazine [ ... ]

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Morrison, Raftery, Gus, KeyArena & March Mattering

by Tyler Parker on Mar 5, 2013 • No Comments

I’m on YouTube and it remembers me. It knows I’ve typed “Gus Johnson’s Best Calls” before and now it’s got another video titled Morris Winner vs. Oklahoma State it wants [ ... ]

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Nick Van Exel: The J.C. Penney Prophet

by Tyler Parker on Mar 4, 2013 • No Comments

“That’s right. That’s right. Yea. I know. Oh my, oh my. It’s me, it’s me. It’s Nicky Van E.” He’d just walked into JC Penny’s and he was pointing [ ... ]

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The Ballerball Sports Emotions Conference

by Jason Gallagher on Mar 1, 2013 • No Comments

If you don’t know already, this weekend is the MIT Sloan Sports Analytics Conference. We’re talking about the most popular conference of it’s kind. It is all about the growing [ ... ]

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Reggie Rose Scouting Report: The Bulls

by Chandler Goodman on Mar 1, 2013 • No Comments

Last week, Reggie Rose, the older brother of Chicago Bulls injured point guard Derrick Rose, made headlines when he criticized the franchise’s roster, telling Chicago media, “It’s frustrating to see [ ... ]

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I Want to Give This “Fan Fiction” Thing a Try

by Jason Gallagher on Feb 28, 2013 • No Comments

A few of our writers seem to have a lot of success in this “fan fiction” business , so I’m shamelessly going to give it a try. They also seem [ ... ]

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Doug Collins Finds The Answer

by Tyler Parker on Feb 27, 2013 • No Comments

Doug Collins is crying in his glass of Sam Adams and he doesn’t know what to do. Another loss. He unleashed his opinions on the world during a press [ ... ]

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Text Convos: Jimmer & Boogie

by John Sabine on Feb 25, 2013 • No Comments

NBA players are prime targets for Phone hackers. We’ve obtained a hacked text conversation between Jimmer Fredette and Demarcus Cousins - - ________________________________________________ Text Convo # 1 ________________________________________________ _________________________________________________________ Text [ ... ]

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Dwight’s Memes

by John Sabine on Feb 22, 2013 • 1 Comment

Uh oh… It looks like Dwight Howard finally discovered Memes. He tried his hand at the art of the meme but it took him awhile to get the hang [ ... ]

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JJ Barea Changes Name

by Tyler Parker on Feb 21, 2013 • No Comments

- Hello my friends. I am writing to you with a heavy heart. The months and weeks leading up to today have been difficult and trying for me and only [ ... ]

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Fisher’s Eleven – All Star: Part 2

by Ryan Weisert on Feb 20, 2013 • 2 Comments

_______ To: Mrs. Anucha Browne Sanders RE: OMG! How soon can we start production?!! I’m glad to hear you’re onboard with this project. I’ll have a script ready for [ ... ]

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Don’t Let Chris Mullin Near Your Birthday Cake

by Tyler Parker on Feb 20, 2013 • No Comments

Mine eyes have seen the glory of the destruction of B.J. Armstrong and Scottie Pippen and Chris Mullin is Chicago’s reckoning. ——————– It’s my friend [ ... ]

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Lost Moments – Rasheed Wallace: The Messiah of The Peach City

by John Sabine on Feb 19, 2013 • No Comments

Do I know where I was February 9, 2004? Of course I do. Every good Atlantan knows exactly where he or she was on that date. It was the day [ ... ]

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The Buckle Wishes Michael Jordan a Happy Birthday

by Jason Gallagher on Feb 18, 2013 • No Comments

– The Buckle has announced that they are holding a world wide party to celebrate Michael Jordan’s 50th birthday. The party will be located at the Myrtle Beach location of [ ... ]

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Norris Cole’s Memorial Day Supreme Magestipartay: Part 1

by Tyler Parker on May 28, 2013 • 1 Comment

PART I ——————– Norris Cole’s Memorial Day Supreme Magestipartay has begun and it is threatening to undo the fibers that keep the walls of Miami standing. ——————– It’s Memorial Day. [ ... ]

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Arena DJ of the Year

by Ryan Weisert on May 24, 2013 • No Comments

The DJ title is decided by a single elimination tournament where team DJ’s face off against one another in a head-to-head battle for in-game entertainment supremacy.

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CLIPPERS COACHING SEARCH LEAKED

by Mark Colomb on May 24, 2013 • 1 Comment

Leaked Internal Clippers Documents. FROM THE DESK OF DONALD STERLING

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Three Short Stories About Gregg Popovich Coaching Everyday Life

by Jason Gallagher on May 17, 2013 • No Comments

We scouted the world (overnight) to find other people that have personally been coached in some way, shape, or form by Gregg Popovich.

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Advertising & the NBA: Russell Westbrook & Ray Ban

by Tyler Parker on May 17, 2013 • No Comments

Lenses are for the lames. The L 7 Weenies. The ones that cry themselves to sleep listening to Transatlanticism on vinyl while they stare out a window and think about [ ... ]