Leaked Mikhail Prokhorov Letters: Billy King – September 13, 2013

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September 15, 2013
 

General Main Mananger,

 

How are you doing my main man Mr. Billy Kings? It’s your boss, Mikky P. I wanted to check in and see how the Basketball Men of Brooklyn are shaping up? Are we still happy times super strong? When in the good gosh darn does our season start? Do I pay these guys when they are not on the courts? Can you look into that for me? It doesn’t matter so much cause you know I ball so hard like my homeboy Mr. Beyonce. We went to Paris last month and I would not stop playing his number one Throne Watcher, Homeboys in Paris. Mr. Beyonce doesn’t like it when I use the N words. I offered him ten millions to give me permissions to say it but no dice. So I say homeboys in its place.

Seriously my man, when do things tip off? I was super excited for the American Footballs to get hitting. My favorite team is English Red Soldiers coached by stalinist dictator Mr. William Bellichex. Man oh man he hates to wear the clothes of rich man, he dresses like sad man with no home. The way he makes that pretty Mr. Gisele lead that team of murders is very impressive. Could we see if he could lead our men into battle if Jason Kidd is no good coach? Mr. Bellichex could lead Footballs men, Basketballs men, any kind of men. He is great leader. Powerful. He is not a guff taker.

Mr. Bellichex is like American version of my homeboy Vladdy P. Did you read his sick burns for American lazies in New York Times? Crazy times my man, crazy times. Syria :( My fantasy team is a mess. Me and some of my other homeboys have a fantasy world leaders league. We each draft leaders of different countries and get points for them being kick ass leaders. It’s a keeper league, my bro. Got that Obama in 2006 and at first he has super dope time. Nobel prize, two time President, and he is great on sketch show Key and Peels. But now? He’s killing me bro. I may need to bench him for angry grandma Hilarious Clinton. Can you believe Roman Abramovich drafted my boy Vladdy P? He is crushing the entire league. No one can stop Valddy P.

Back to the B-Balls. Seriously when do they start playing the games? Can we beat Miami Hots? My money guy told me that I am spending more than $70 million in taxes. Thank Lenin it’s only American money and not real cash. Right bro time? Can we get any more old guys for big money? I like that Kenny Smith and Charles Broccoli on the Turner Nation Television station. Can they still hoop it up? They cannot be much older than my mans Pierce and Kay Gee. Sign them all up to lifetime deals. No one leaves Brooklyn. We are like KGB buddy.

Once you are Brooklyn man you do not get to leave unless you are that Mr. Kardashian. Hoo Boy what a dope. He tried to party with me and Mr. Beyonce once. Not fun times my man. He smelled like chicken wings and choco tacos. Me and Mr. Beyonce made him hang out with Mr. Canne-Ye. That didn’t look like party town. I love Chaco Tacos my man. Can we get them in my box during games? Can you check with my money man and maybe we can just buy the company? Let me know when we start to get our dunk on homeboy. Keep it sleazy.

Party Times and Stretch Limos,

– Mikky P.

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