Joakim & Andray’s Feet: A Conversation

joe noah

Joakim Noah’s bad feet and Andray Blatche’s good feet saw each other in passing in the tunnel after the Bulls win over the Nets on Monday night. This is the conversation that took place.

Noah’s Feet: (Grimaces) Hey man. Good game.

Blatche’s Feet: Geez, man. How’d you do that? There was just one of you.

NF: I don’t know, dudes. Adrenaline just sort of took over and we stopped feeling anything.

BF: Man, that’s nuts. We feel, like, everything. We get super tired real fast.

NF: We seen that, yea. Especially tonight, because it was the both of y’all against just one of us.

BF: Right?! PJ was thinking the same thing. He was yelling and carrying on in the timeouts. Thought a Blatche was gonna have to go Sprewell on him. (Laughs) We’re playing. His face weirds us out. We couldn’t touch him.

NF: We bet. But, like, and we don’t mean this as an insult, we’re legitimately wondering, how’d we beat you to loose balls and out rebound you and stuff?

BF: WE DON’T KNOW, MAN. It’s some craziness. Good for y’all, though, my dudes.

NF: Thanks, man. We didn’t expect it. Because, you know, We hadn’t played for so long, and y’all destroyed us in game one, and we were having a hard time moving because, again, there was really only one of us.

BF: Totally, man. We feel you completely. We were pumped for you. It was rad to see.

NF: Geez. Well, thanks. You’re a lot nicer than we’d be in this situation.

BF: Oh, dude, it’s just a game. Just a silly game. We’re bout to get in something tonight, though. You trying to come with?

NF: Vamp time?

BF: Vamp time.

NF: (Laughs) Nah. Thibs would be kind of really pissed if he knew we went out.

BF: We feel you. SO GLAD we don’t play for that guy.

NF: It’s actually pretty great.

BF: Pretty great for you two. Would be a disaster for me.

NF: Yea. Well, we gotta get some treatment done, though. Five minutes ice. Ten minutes heat. That kind of thing.

BF: Loud and clear, homeys. One last effort, though. We were gonna grab some Papa Johns. If y’all want in, that’s totally cool. If y’all don’t come it’s just gonna be us and Stack and we’re kind of afraid he’s gonna hit us.

NF: Man, we love PJ’s, but we can’t. Y’all know how it is.

BF: That’s that All-Star mentality. Killing it. We’ll be out then. See you soon, though?

NF: For sure.

BF: Dope. Hey, fore we let you go, we were gonna ask you something. How you feel about Girls Love Beyonce?

NF: What, that new Drake joint?

BF: Yeaaaa.

NF: It gooooeeees. We’re about it.

BF: Right?!…We knew we liked you. Bogans was trying to say it was garbage.

NF: No. We’re with you. Bogans can kick rocks. That’s that jam right now.

BJ: That it is, my mans. But we’ll be out. Let y’all get to maxin and relaxin all cool.

NF: Thanks, bros. Good game.

BF: (Expletive) Not for us.

NF: Y’all will bounce back.

BF: Thanks, my dudes. See yall soon.

NF: Bye bye bye.

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