Jeffree David “Jeff” Withey: An Obituary


Jeffree David “Jeff” Withey was a fantastic blocker of shots during his stint at the University of Kansas. He had an interesting spelling of his first name and showed some light promise as a potential second or third big for a borderline playoff team some four or five years down the line. He was an energy guy. He was.

A two-time Big 12 Defensive player of the year and 2nd Team All-American at Kansas, Withey was drafted by the Portland Trail Blazers with the 39th overall pick in the 2013 NBA Draft. He was later traded to the New Orleans Pelicans in a three team trade on July 10, 2013, where he remained until his savage and untimely death at the hands of a man he thought was his friend. That man was not his friend. That man was his end. Withey appeared in four of the seven Pelican games in the 2013-2014 season averaging 0.7 PPG.

This is another in a long line of deaths for Jayhawk post-men with Withey’s demise coming after Wayne Simien, Raef LaFrentz, Cole Aldrich, Drew Gooden, Darnell Jackson, and Alexander “Sasha” Khan all ceased to exist. Withey is survived by no one. He has no one.

Withey died of shame on November 12, 2013 at the age of 23 on the Staples Center floor in downtown Los Angeles, California. Angelinos cheered after it happened. He lay there, slain, the crimson of his blood stretching its slow moving hands all across the violet lane.

Withey was killed by Xavier Henry, a former teammate of his at Kansas during the 2009-2010 season. Henry is currently wanted for questioning. If you have any knowledge of his whereabouts, please contact the Los Angeles Police Department at 9-1-1 and tell them just how incredible that dunk was in case they haven’t seen it.

1 Comment

  • Reply November 13, 2013


    I hate Xavier Henry so much. Because his name looks French, but it’s not. Because of this dunk. Because he has two first names. Because he played like a warmed over turd in New Orleans, but I suppose everyone can find their inner-Laker in L.A.

    Maybe he got a case of the Eric Gordons and just didn’t feel like doing it in NOLA, but that doesn’t mean I have to believe in him, right?

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