Hawks & Wolves & Cords, Oh No



I once chose Mountain Dew Baja Blast over regular Mountain Dew at a Taco Bell and felt good about it. So, in no way am I perfect either. Coach Taylor wasn’t lying. We will all be tested. Sometimes, like me at that soda fountain, we’ll fail those tests.

This poor kid. He could’ve seen anyone. LeBron. Durant. Kobe. Anyone. And what does he do? He picks the Hawks and the Wolves.

Now, let’s give this dude who is clearly at the forefront of the wide rimmed glasses are taking over the NBA movement the benefit of the doubt and say that he’s not clueless when it comes to the goings on of the league. The Wolves were supposed to be salty as ever this year with Love and Rubio but injuries decimated them and made them a non factor come playoff time. Then you’ve got the Fighting Ill Advised 20 Foot Jumpers, the Atlanta Hawks. A perennial playoff team and one that, barring injury, was pretty much guaransheed to be a 4-6 seed once more.

It’s not that the teams he picked are bad. At the beginning of the year, especially, they were supposed to be good. It’s that, when given a chance to pick any two teams in the league, how is your selection not some combination of the Heat, Spurs, Thunder, Clippers, Lakers (at that time), Knicks (at that time), or Celtics (at that time)? When you can pick the perceived best, why pick the perceived gonna be kind of good?

He seems like a nice enough dude. Clearly intelligent. You don’t just wear cords without having some sense to you. Guy would appear to be downright chill. So chill. Perhaps the chilliest. Chill like an air conditioner store. Chill like that bottle of Coors Light that kept pissing off Ice Cube during football season. Chill like Shawn Hunter at a poetry reading in the middle of a trailer park. You know…chill.

But still, I have to believe he’s regretting his choice now. You can tell he even surprised himself when he picked the Wolves. You got to beware of that charming Rubio smile. It’ll leave you drooling, yes, but it ain’t Durant mixing somebody at the top of the key and finishing over Hibbert. And it’s not LeBron catching an oop Wade tossed from half court. You have to go with the teams closest to a sure thing. You just have to.

This isn’t meant to insult. It’s just meant to caution future dudes or dudettes who are lucky enough to not only have the opportunity to go to an NBA game, but also the opportunity to CHOOSE which two NBA teams they see live next year. For this, this is a cautionary tale. If you have a chance to see the greatest player in the league, you take it. Be wise, strong people who somehow made it to this sentence. If given the chance, use your heads. Pick greatness.

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