God Welcomes Dean Smith to Heaven


God: Welcome, Dean.

Dean: Thanks. I never was quite sure I’d make it.

God: Why’s that?

Dean: I don’t know. You just never want to take anything for granted.

God: Kenny Smith’s wrist.

Dean: Sure.

God: I appreciate you never throwing any chairs.

Dean: Oh, I wanted to.

God: Well, anyways, it didn’t go unnoticed.

Dean: I wasn’t perfect. Far from it actually.

God: Why do you think I invented the shot clock?

Dean: The Four Corners wasn’t that bad.

God: My Four Horsemen take less time.

Dean: I believe in strategy.

God: I believe in beauty.

Dean: Well, I think there was some of that too.

God: There was. You had some beautiful teams.

Dean: I just wanted them to be beautiful men.

God: Some of them are.

Dean: I think they all can be. They’re young yet.

God: Some.

Dean: They’re younger than me.

God: That’s very true.

Dean: Could I have done more?

God: We could all do more.

Dean: I guess you’re right.

God: You know Jordan’s not my son.

Dean: Oh, I never said that. That was Larry Bird.

God: Just thought I’d clarify.

Dean: You know, he wasn’t mine either.

God: You were there when he needed you.

Dean: Seems like it could’ve been more. Maybe not for him, but for someone.

God: You’re not me.

Dean: Yeah, but you want to be strong for the boys.

God: You did good.

Dean: Is Phog around? I’d like to ask him some things.

God: About the x’s and o’s?

Dean: Yeah, about the x’s and o’s. It’s like I finally have a good seat.

God: You always had a good seat.

Dean: It wasn’t bad, but this one’s better.

God: Like League Pass or March Madness?

Dean: Sort of.

God: Like the ACC Tournament or the Big Four Tournament?

Dean: Sort of.

God: Like Fred Brown not seeing James Worthy?

Dean: Sort of.

God: Like Chris Webber calling a timeout?

Dean: Like no timeouts are needed. Like every basket has an inbounds pass to follow.

God: That sounds nice.

Dean: Doesn’t it?

Bryan Harvey tweets @LawnChairBoys.

*Thanks Dean, for your impact on the game that we love so much. 

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