5-vs-5: The X-Factors

x factor yeah yeah
 

The NBA season has officially kicked off and while it’s too early to make any predictions, it’s NOT too early to talk about the most important facet to the NBA game….  X-Factors!  We asked our 5-vs-5 NBA experts about the ins-and-outs of what it is to be an x-factor, to better keep you informed for the 2013-2014 NBA season.

Our experts are: Chandler Goodman (@SuchAGoodman), John Sabine (@jsabine214), Tyler Parker(@_tkparker), Jason Gallagher (@jga41agher) and Chris Trew (@Trew2TheGame).  

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1. Who is the biggest X-factor on their respective team for the 2013-2014 season?

Goodman: The single biggest X-factor is whether Jeremy Lamb has truly become an X-factor. If, as many scouts have suggested, Lamb has elevated his game from D-League scrub to NBA X-factor, then the Thunder may have the X-Factor they need to make a return trip to the Finals. If not, they could be major players in the X-factor market at the trade deadline.

Sabine: Xavier Henry! His name starts with an X and he had one awesome game!

Parker: It’s Blake Shelton, clearly. He’s coming off back to back Championships and has an opportunity to do something that no other coach in the history of The Voice has been able to do: three peat. His ability to take singers with indie-singer/songwriter sensibilities and repurpose their voices through Country ballads is always one of the more impressive and compelling things on television today. If he’s able to get some momentum this year, look out.

Gallagher: We’re only two games in, BUT I really think the Miami Heat’s LeBron James is going to be a big x-factor for the Miami Heat this year.   Don’t hold me to that… it’s just a gut feeling.

Trew: The biggest X-Factor is Xavier Henry, even though everyone else is probably saying the same thing. If they are not well then that’s a huge missed opportunity for them. The Lakers are trying to win a championship this year and with Kobe Bryant nursing that injury, the entire city of Southern California is leaning on Xavier to not only lead the way to the playoffs, but to score at least 81 points against the Raptors.

 

2. Which team has the most X-Factors on it?

Goodman: The Cleveland Cavaliers lead the league with five X-factors (Anderson Varejao’s durability, Andrew Bynum’s knees/motivation/hair, Tristan Thompson’s right-handed jumper, Anthony Bennett’s Chipotle intake, whether his teammates stop giving Tyler Zeller wedgies)

Sabine: The Golden State Warriors. Iggy, Steph, Klay, and Harrison Barnes are like the X-Factor Mount Rushmore.

Parker: The Oklahoma City Thunder. Lamb, Westbrook’s knee, the development of Serge’s post game, Steven Adams minutes, Scott Brooks and his in game mic moments, Clay Bennett and his T-shirt over dress shirt combo, the potential for a Hinder national anthem…X Factors all over the court in Bricktown this season.

Gallagher: The Blue Barracudas.  No doubt.

Trew: The Charlotte Bobcats. If we’re including the D-League I would still say the Charlotte Bobcats. I’m not making fun of the Bobcats as a basketball team, I’m just saying that the Charlotte basketball organization as a whole has the most X-Factors on it. Right on down to the concession workers. You just never know what you’re gonna get in Charlotte. By the way, this also includes everything in Charlotte City Limits. Everyone there needs to take a damn chill pill. Geez, Charlotte, get off my back. Charlotte, will you please leave me alone?

 

3. Who is the biggest X-Factor on PLANET EARTH?

Goodmman: 9-way tie between record producer Rick Rubin, New York Times columnist Paul Krugman, House Minority Whip Steny Hoyer, NBC Entertainment Chairman Bob Greenblatt, Iranian President Hassan Rouhani, the person leading the effort to develop next generation toilet paper that is even more comfy for my butt, the NCAA playoff selection committee, the man penning the Veronica Mars movie (Rob Thomas), & Kawhi Leonard

Sabine: Putin.

Parker: Kyle Chandler and his refusal to partake in Friday Night Lights: The Movie. If he chooses to be a part of this the project is greenlit. If he does not, the millions of fans around the globe will be forced to deal with the television show’s PERFECT ending and take it as the gospel it should be. Hold out, Coach. Don’t let this happen.

Gallagher: The guy who started drugs.  He really shook things up with that invention.  “Should I do them, should I not?”  “Should I fight them?  Should I not?”  “Should I sell them, should I not?”  “Should they be legal, should they not?”  Too many questions.  No concrete answers.  Game changer.

Trew: Ex-professional wrestler X-pac who I once saw at a Tampa bar getting riled up on the dance floor to his own theme song which he asked the DJ to play. Second place, Styxx. Third place, 1-2-3 Kid. Basically, Sean Waltan is the biggest X-Factor alive.

 

4. Have you ever been an X-Factor?  Explain.

Goodman: My friend once read an email from his girlfriend too fast and brought me with him to meet her at a restaurant. It turned out to be at a very (VERY) fancy Italian restaurant. There were essentially only tables for two. She was wearing a dress and we were wearing very disgusting old Cleveland Indians hats. We had to have the waiter pull up a third chair for me. My friend and I had each already had 6 beers. My presence was the X-Factor as to whether he got dumped.

Sabine: Yeah! Well one time my mom was running late and asked me to DVr “The X-Factor” for her. Without me she would’ve had to watch it online and that would’ve been worse than death.

Parker: Yes. At camp once we did a trust fall and we had to let our new youth minister fall onto us. He wasn’t small. Had I not been there in the center he would have fallen and all our souls would’ve been at stake. I saved at least 12 lives that day.

Gallagher: Unfortunately, I have not.  But I’ve been listening a lot to “Radioactive” by Imagine Dragons while doing P90X.  So I’m pretty sure I’ll be ready when it’s my time.

Trew: On this very website I am an X-Factor as I don’t watch basketball (ever) and I respond to all writing assignment emails with distracting homemade gifs of my wife dressed up as my ex-girlfriend Charlotte which nobody understands, most importantly, my wife.

 

5. What is an X-factor, exactly?

Goodman: As Supreme Court Justice Potter Stewart once famously said of hard-core pornography, “I know it when I see it.”

Sabine: An X-Factor is someone who gives 110%, never gives up, 100 miles and hour into the fire, with the swagger of a King and the vision of a Prophet Samsung Galaxy

Parker: Have you ever been on a patio eating and drinking with your friends at night. It’s a warm evening. There’s only a hint of breeze. You starting to get to where you can’t see, though. The night’s swallowing you. Then your buddy Cal plugs in the multi-colored Christmas lights that hang along the porch overhang. You can see now. What’s more, it’s a pleasant and soft sort of light. The kind that a Valencia filter on The Gram can set off something beautiful. This Christmas lights are the X-Factor. The thing that true joy and success hinges on.

Gallagher: It’s like a big awesome invisible (untangle)  limb that grows out of someone when they feed it enough water, effort and P90X.

Trew: Ha. Nice try.

1 Comment

  • […] Ballerballer Tyler Parker says OKC’s got lots of x-factors: “Lamb, Westbrook’s knee, the development of Serge’s post game, Steven Adams minutes, Scott Brooks and his in game mic moments, Clay Bennett and his T-shirt over dress shirt combo, the potential for a Hinder national anthem…X Factors all over the court in Bricktown this season.” […]

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